I hate shopping

My trip to Wal-Mart yielded little in the way of merchandise, but much in the way of revelation. I am not in any way, shape or form ready to be around children again. Wal-Mart was full of the little urchins, and they were in rare form. ("It's the most wonderful time of the year...") Whining, crying, begging, screeching. Darting in and out of aisles, hanging off of shopping carts, climbing on displays. I wanted to run them over with my cart. One in particular, actually. A girl, about seven years old, decided it'd be a hoot to set off every blessed singing/animated/talking toy in the kiddie aisle and then run like hell.

I'm thinking about early retirement.