Reacquainting myself with an old friend

I decided to dig out my volume of Dorothy Parker poetry tonight. Here are a few examples of why I absolutely adore her:

Unfortunate Coincidence
By the time you swear you're his,
Shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is
Infinite, undying -
Lady, make a note of this:
One of you is lying.

Prophetic Soul
Because your eyes are slant and slow,
Because your hair is sweet to touch,
My heart is high again; but oh,
I doubt if this will get me much.

Godspeed
Oh, seek, my love, your newer way;
I'll not be left in sorrow.
So long as I have yesterday,
Go take your damned tomorrow!

Indian Summer
In youth, it was a way I had
To do my best to please,
And change, with every passing lad,
To suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know,
And do the things I do;
And if you do not like me so,
To hell, my love, with you!

Experience
Some men break your heart in two,
Some men fawn and flatter,
Some men never look at you;
And that cleans up the matter.

Parker writes longer poems, too... but this is just a sampling of some of her shorter ones. She is the queen of bitterness and irony and sarcasm and cynicism. She is my literary hero. Go check her out and read the rest. It's better than Alanis Morrissette for female angst.