Saturday, July 26, 2008

Harder and harder to breathe.

I need some help from anyone who's in a position to offer advice. Even if you're not in a position to offer advice. I don't care. I just need someone to tell me anything that might calm me down a little.

I'm having money issues. I know some (or all) of you have been in the same boat before. My current problem is that I'm trying to live off of my Catholic school salary, which isn't stretching as far as it used to. When I moved out of my parents' house last year, I still had a decent amount of money in my checking account and a good amount put away in savings, and I was pretty comfortable. But over time, my checking account depleted... and I had to dip into my savings to make ends meet.

You know the whole story about the job hunt... I've been blogging about it for ages. I haven't had any luck finding a new job for next school year, so I'm back in the Catholic school again. Not the end of the world... I still have a job, etc etc. But I was pretty convinced that I'd have something by now. And every time someone asks about it, they say the same thing: "Oh, I thought for sure you'd have a new job by now." I heard that twice last weekend and it really got to me. I think that's what set off the panic. I was sure that my degrees and my experience would be enough to get me hired at some fabulous (and better paying) school district. What I didn't think about was the thousands of college grads who would also be looking for work this summer. A teacher's salary is determined by education and experience. It costs less to hire a teacher fresh out of college than it does to hire me.

On top of that, our last paycheck for this past school year will come on August 15, and our first check for the new school year will be on September 5, which means I have to go 3 weeks between checks instead of 2. It doesn't sound like a huge deal, but when you live paycheck to paycheck, it can be. I'm really hoping I don't have anything major to pay for in that time.

So the failed job hunt and the pay gap have me pretty upset. On top of that, I have bills due and our fridge is practically empty. I don't have enough money for social events or extras. Everytime I think about it, my chest tightens, my throat constricts, and my head throbs. (Is that a panic attack? If it is, I've been having them for the past few days.)

Like I said, I know I'm not the only one who's been in this boat. And I'm sure there are people who have been worse off than I have. But this is the worst I've ever been and it's freaking me out.

So here's where the advice comes in. I need to know if anyone has any tricks for saving money, stretching paychecks, cutting corners or anything along those lines. (I'm already looking for a second job.) And I desperately need some advice on how to stay calm. I can't deal with the panic.

Thanks in advance. I hate sounding dramatic and needy... and I hate airing my money issues here on myspace. But I just don't know what else to do.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

updates...

Well, friends... it's mid-July. Normally, this is the time of year when I start getting back-to-school fever. Not because I miss work or anything... or course not. Not even a little bit. (Well, maybe just a smidge.) But mostly because this is the time of year when all the stores start advertising back-to-school sales, and I get the urge to stock up on goodies for my classroom. But this year is a little different. I have no idea where I'll be in September.

As most (or all) of you know, I've been job hunting for awhile. Since last summer, to be exact, but my trip to Australia got in the way of that. Anyway, I started updating my paperwork again this past February and by April I was sending out resumes and application packets. (Applying for a teaching job is like applying to college... I
blogged about it awhile back if you're interested. Which you're probably not, unless you're a teacher. In which case, you'd already know the process, so forget it, lol.)

Since I have no summer job, my mornings consist of searching 4 job-finder websites and 21 local school district websites for available positions. Between April and now, I have sent resumes/application packets to 8 different schools/districts. Out of those 8, I've heard from 2 districts. I had an interview with the one school district last week (which went well), and I got a form postcard from another school district (no positions now, but they hold my resume for a year).

I'm starting to get worried. I'm well qualified, I have great experience, and all my paperwork is in order. So why haven't I heard back from other schools? Is something wrong with my resume? Sigh.

On the plus side, I still have a job to fall back on. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. I have to be back in my classroom in mid-August to start setting up, so if I don't get another job offer before then, I'll have to give up on the job hunt for this year.

Keep some fingers and toes crossed for me.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Mnohaya Lita!

Yesterday was the christening of my godson's son. For the record, my godson Kyle is actually my cousin's son... which I think makes him my first cousin once removed. Which would make his son Gabriel... ummm... I have no idea. First cousin twice removed, I think. Complicated. Anyway, the christening was held at St. Mary's Ukrainian Church... no matter what Kyle's faults, at least the boy decided to baptize his son in the Ukrainian church. He was well trained, lol.

The christening was scheduled for 11 AM (which is more like 11:30 AM, Ukrainian time). When I got out of the shower at 10 AM, I saw that I had 3 missed calls, all from Kyle. I called him back immediately.

"What's up?" I said.

"Well... I'm in a bit of trouble," he replied.

Yeah, what else is new? "Okay, what do you need?" I asked.

He hesitated. "A godmother."

Yes, you read that right. The godmother that Kyle and Natalie had chosen for baby Gabriel called at 9:30 the morning of the christening and BACKED OUT. She didn't want to stand in front of people. She didn't think she was mature enough. (I got news for you, kiddo... no one involved is mature enough...) She asked Natalie (the baby's mother) if someone else could stand up and hold the baby for her... and Natalie informed her that it doesn't quite work that way.

So Kyle called in a favor... and of course, I accepted. It's always an honor to be chosen as a godparent. Even if I wasn't the first choice. I really don't mind that I wasn't their first choice... they're young, they have friends... and I'm already a godmother. But in all honesty, anyone who backs out of being a godparent less than two hours before the ceremony probably wouldn't be a very good godparent. So maybe it worked out for the best. Like my aunt said, God works in mysterious ways.

If any of you have ever been to a Ukrainian mass, you know how LONG it is. (And anyone who's been to St. Mary's... Sam, Tim, Miguel... you know how much their priest loves to talk.) A normal mass is about an hour and a half. Add the Baptism, Confirmation and reception of First Communion, and we're looking at a two hour ordeal.

(Sidenote, for those not familiar with the Ukrainian rite: in our tradition, a child is baptized and confirmed at the same time... and as of a few years ago, they also receive their First Communion the same day. Communion in the Ukrainian Church is a cube of bread soaked in wine... not the dry host that you receive in the Roman Catholic Church. So the baby gets the wine until he's old enough to have the bread.)

The ceremony started in the back of the church with baby Gabriel dressed in a onesie and wrapped in a red cloth. During this part, the parents and godparents renewed their baptismal vows. Then we proceed to the front of the church for an anointment of healing, which is followed by the actual baptism. Gabriel's onesie was removed and he was placed in the baptismal font, where water was poured over him. He was wrapped in a white cloth and handed back to his mother.

At this point, Natalie and I got to take Gabe back to the crying room to change him into his cute little christening suit (and... darn the luck... we missed Father's homily during that time). Once we returned, the ceremony continued. Now Gabe was wrapped in the white cloth again for his chrismation (which is when he was anointed with chrism... his confirmation). Then we were FINALLY allowed to return to our pew for the rest of the mass.

At communion time, Kyle took Gabriel up to receive the his First Communion. According to Kyle, Gabe seemed to enjoy the wine... typical Silva, lol. The mass continued... and then finally, blessedly... it was over, and everyone sang "Mnohaya Lita," which is a blessing for the baby, translating to, "God grant him many happy years." And then it was really over. Except for the taking of pictures. SIGH. And THEN it was over. (!)

Then we did what every good Ukrainian family does after a ceremony... we ate. And it was good. (Mmmm... kielbasa... )

So now I have two godsons. My godson and my godson's son. Crazy stuff, huh? And isn't the baby a cutie???

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

I’m wide awake, it’s morning...

I'm pretty sure that's the name of a song. Or an album. Not sure. Either way, I actually am wide awake right now. I've been up since 8 AM. Of course, the reason I woke up so early hasn't arrived yet. We're having kitchen leaks again, right above the sink. When I woke up yesterday morning, the entire counter was soaked and water was dripping onto the floor. Last night the landlord's nephew came over to check it out and he thinks there's a cracked pipe somewhere. He said the landlord would be over today between 8 and 9 AM. It's now after 10 AM, and no sign of him. Surprise, surprise.

So let me tell you about my summer. One of my pet peeves is when people find out I'm a teacher and they say, "Oh, it must be so great to have your summers off!" Let me assure you, dear reader, it is NOT all it's cracked up to be. Once I'm off of my normal schedule, I get summer insomnia. I don't do anything all day, so I'm not tired at night. As a result, I'm up til around 2 or 3 AM and then sleep until 10 AM. I wake up, eat breakfast, watch TV, read, check email. Lather, rinse, repeat. I've never been so bored.

I tried looking for a part-time retail job, but didn't have much luck. My mother told me to try the mall... but... sigh... I'm 30. I just can't go work in the mall. The whole reason I went to college is so I wouldn't have to work in the mall anymore. (Sorry if I've offended anyone who DOES work in the mall... I did it for years, and it's just not for me.)

I've also been spending about an hour a day looking for a new teaching job. I have several application packets out there... and currently one interview scheduled... but otherwise, no luck. I do a daily search on careerbuilder, craigslist, monster and PAREAP (employment website for teachers in PA). I bookmarked websites for every school district in the area and I check those every few days to see if any new job postings are up. And once a week I check the Inquirer. It's frustrating.

Anyway... can you believe it's July already? This time last year I was in Australia. Actually, at this exact time, I was in the air, somewhere over Hawaii. I wish I had the money to travel again this year... but it is what it is. It's probably for the best, though. If I went away, I wouldn't be able to job hunt. And if I get a new job that pays more, then I can plan a decent trip. Somewhere out of the country. I miss flying. (This from the girl who used to get nightmares two months before an hour long flight to Orlando.)

(It's 10:30 AM... landlord just got here. He always has a way of making these kitchen leaks sound like they're our fault. "I don't understand why it does this. I've never had this many complaints before." Fucker. The water is coming from our ceiling, everytime the upstairs neighbors wash their dishes or run their garbage disposal. By what stretch of the imagination is that our fault?)

The holiday weekend is fast approaching. So where are all the cookouts? The BBQs? The backyard pool parties? I feel like things have been strangely quiet this summer. But I actually do have some weekend plans. I'll most likely be at my parents' house on Saturday to use the pool. And Sunday is my godson's son's christening. I'm sure that'll be quite the event. Whenever a new Silva is welcomed into the world, it's always a cause for celebration. Or is it alarm? (Joe, maybe you know the answer to this... lol...) Anyway, I'm sure there will be plenty of pictures of the precious bundle of joy next week.

Well... that's all from my end. Time to go check email, watch TV, read and look for a job. Ugh.

(PS - I just looked it up. "I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning," is an album by Bright Eyes.)